We’re finding out a lot more about social media each day; the way that people communicate, entrepreneurialise and share information is altering everything from politics, to economics, to shopping – the entire breath of human experience. The Gurunomics team has been hard at work these last two years on a series of consultancies that have syngerised, gamified and crowdsauced. Our clients have found the innovative cosmoturfing techniques of our specialised Gurunauts and Trainee Gurunauts (your contribution is valuable!) have turbocharged their SEOs in a post-social media world.

Why “post-social media”? Well, the gold rush with finding new users has largely come to an end. Until African broadband speeds improve and Latin American governments allow greater use of social media metrics, we will have to find other sources of social media to fuel our community and economy.

1. Invent New Users

If clicks are money, and people are clicks.. then the solution is simple. We need more people! Astroturfing is about creating a false field of information to change the way the game is played. Our patented Cosmoturfing is almost the opposite; we create more stars in the sky to shine light on your business! We have figured ways around IP sniffing, advertising rankers, Alexa, web counters, Facebook APIs to increase stats. Better yet, we automatically generated identities that systematically join Facebook, Twitter, apply for passports and real estate, join dating websites, and so on. These cosmoturf seeds are an important element of the new digital economy.

2. Use Branding Sparingly

Think of it as being sustainable with your advertising. You can’t continually push a message in an environment where people are looking to become sustainable social media users. You need to avoid being taken off people’s lists, right? A good tip is to mix the branded message with the unbranded message. For example, some tweets on a particular day could be:

(10.34) What a great day! I sure do hope the local cafe has a can of Pepsi Max waiting for me.
(10.43) Great! My authentic local cafe is looking after me with the cool refreshing taste of Pepsi Max!
(10.50) Breakfast alone makes me want to die.
(10.53) Pepsi Max. I am drinking a drink.

3.  Connect the Offline Life

While recent trends like gamification have captured the imagination, its just part of a broader push to allow the forms and structures of our rich online lives into further and further parts of the unconnected, unmonetised elements of our meat-lives. A system of badges that relate to everyday tasks and extraordinary difficult tasks can help motivate and systematise your friends and family. Gurunomics will soon unveil its “Serendipity Causation Outside Technological Systems” program, in which young people are trained by older social media experts in how the formats of online life can be used in the real world.

4. Delete and Restart Your Social Media Accounts In A Storm of Righteous Fury

This goes without saying. You can create the excitement of a new series of people’s favourite television shows by periodically ending and restarting your social media profiles. This is now considered a key strategy in brand building!

5.

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The future of entertainment is now. We don’t have to see the future to see that in that future, everybody will be looking for new ways to connect over their iPhones. The Augmented Resolution Game market is exploding right now, with experiences being set up across markets and crowdgroups to promote massive products that cannot generate word-of-mouth communication any other way. The recent videoplaygame, Halo 3, was presaged by a very popular and expensive ARG called “I Love Having Bees On My Face”. The quirky, indie-like nature of bees and the popular urban value of ‘love’ were correctly and thoroughly thought through to a final product – a series of half-connected clues that urban creatives could unravel while sitting on their polished floorboard homes in their rainbow tubesocks.

Introducing TWNPFD aka townpoofed aka Tanner Wakefield Never Pays For Dinner. The essential format of the game is that of the dinner date, the most value-rich romantic experience available to creative urbans and trendmashers. Small overheads of the format allow the host to attend to every player who can unravel the clues through the iPhone add and the geocached paper clues left on the front of bills at expensive eateries across the country. The final paper clue that links the iPhone application with the dinner bill is available only to the players that work out how to be in a position to wake Tanner up with eggs and bacon in the morning, two poached on ciabatta thanks.

Get your iPhones twittering and let the games begin!

(c) – Tanner Wakefield Enterdustries

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We’re on the verge of a technological revolution. People are communicating in ways that earlier users of multimedia devices could have scarcely imagined. All you need to be part of a globally connected community is a GPS-enabled phone with a good uplink, subscriptions to a wide range of incrementally different services, a laptop, a good service plan, thousands of dollars worth of software, a bluetooth network, a backup harddrive (wireless optional), a RSS feed manager, and a few years experience of managing all of the above. Democracy has arrived.

Twitter is a great example. Its so new, and so powerful, that its very newness may be part of its usefulness. What is Malcolm McLuhan was right – that the medium is the message? Well these days, with products such as Twitter, TweetDeck, Tweetface, Tweettree, Tweetringmuscle and the fabulous new John Tweet Gacy, it could be that the medium is now the medium is the message. We’re able to take 140-character proclamations from bored agents of the overeducated middle-class anywhere we want – on an Apple iPhone, Apple MacBook, Apple Macbook Pro, Apple iBook (though we really should upgrade!), or a Linux-based mini-PC if our consultancy partners require us to have a Windows desktop.

Using Twitter may be the most important thing that a person can in the today’s media ecology; without participation, all the technology in the world is not going to help anybody. Imagine how much better off the people of Darfur will be when they are able to use Twitter accounts (or any of the subsidiary services) to feed each other needs of an impending Janjaweed militia attack? Ground-up organising has proven, in the election of technologically-aware zeitgeist-politicians like Barack Obama, Kevin Rudd and Silvio Berlusconi, that it is possible for the people to take the power back from the static old forms of power.

But we can’t stop at Twitter. Twitter is already going too slow. We now need to think laterally into new kinds of newness, so that the news of tomorrow can be transmitted as fast as we can communicate – the event horizon of media, of course, is a totally unmediated system of instantaneous communication emanating from each event, cause or other newsbit. Ultimately, we could dream that a giant communication tower that was crowdsauced from a swarm of angel investors could be built somewhere convinient, such as Al Hillah, Babil Province, Iraq. Building towards that goal, though, is what we have to do right now, to make our current news even more new.

Introducing the Tanner Wakefield solution: Babl.

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Some people think pie charts are simplistic, cliched, or even unscientific.

But maybe they should think again:

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With the sudden flood of social media marketing expert consultant authors out there on the global Internet these days, you might be wondering how to stand out from the crowd.

Well, don’t worry, we’re here to help!

Here are five tips for cultivating an affable online social media expert persona on the social web.

1. Be sincere. A rapier wit, a keen sense of irony (or even a general sense of humour!) might score you points at fancy dinner parties, but they will get you nowhere in the world of social network media marketing. Jokes can offend or annoy, and the last thing a social media marketing expert wants to be is offensive or annoying. Remember: it is impossible to take yourself (or social media!) too seriously.

2. Be positive! Your twitterfans would much rather hear about the latest tips and tricks for online marketing business than  sad news from Gaza or one of those other war places. If you need to break up your stream of killer strategies and Mashable links with something, try retweeting something from the human interest section of your city’s online newspaper’s twitter feed. The only exception is if, say, an extremely important person from the social media technologies business world dies, resigns, or falls ill – because that could affect tech stock prices and gadget design, so it has relevance. And don’t forget to add plenty of exclamation marks and smiley faces to your feel-good tweets!

3. Demonstrate family values. In your twitter profile, do you focus on your own selfish and possibly effeminate interests (if you’re a guy, and I’m assuming you are!), or do you represent yourself more neutrally, as part of the global American Family? Let me give you an illustration based on two apparently similar but actually very different Twitter profiles. One social media expert consultant (let’s call him Gavin) describes himself as a “ne’er-do-well with a weakness for indie pop, the works of Immanuel Kant and a well-made martini.”  Can you see how he’s alienating his potential audience with obscure cultural references and non-positive humour? A second contender (let’s call him Dick) uses his character limit more productively, describing himself as a “SEO, marketing junkie, web designer, social media expert, father of two, Christian, and keen hiker.” Dick is clearly both an expert in the web and a stolidly heterosexual white American Dad with a healthy appreciation of nature – and we all know how Green nature is! Dick appeals to everyone. Gavin, on the other hand…well, let me just ask you: Which one of these two social media expert consultants are you going to trust with YOUR business??

4. Be a follower, not a leader. That sounds back-to-front, right? Well, it’s not! On Twitter, autofollow everyone who follows you as well as those whose profiles match your chosen keywords (hints: social media, marketing, SEO). And don’t forget to follow up by welcoming your audience to the conversation: @reply every new follower, without exception. The content doesn’t matter, the @reply is what counts.Most importantly, re-tweet everything the Twitter Elite like Guy Kawasaki or Robert Scoble say – do it twice if you can take time out from invoicing clients!

A word of warning, though – you don’t want to follow everyone who becomes your Twitter fan and follows you (and there will be plenty, trust me!). There are a lot of people who twitter the old-fashioned, heritage media way – using their 140 characters to express their feelings, describe where they are, review a film, or connect with RL friends. Don’t get sucked in! Remember your focus is social media marketing; only connect with people who have the same interests as you! That way, like-minded social media marketing expert twitterers are more likely to follow you back. Everything else is just noise.

5. Appeal to everybody. Remember, when you get right down to it, everybody is the same. If they aren’t, they probably aren’t your core business. They may not even be in your country! Remember your core values: community, connection, and conservatism. If it worked for Amway, it can work for YOU.

How do YOU cultivate an affable online social media expert persona?

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I think the whole GuruHive will agree that for too way long, the MSM (Mainstream Medicine) have been telling us what to think about surgical procedures.

Well now, “the people formerly known as the patients”, empowered by peer-to-peer technologies and ShareThinking ™, are taking responsibility for everything from angioplasties to apendectomies. And – you guessed it - the “pros” aren’t happy about the threat to their elite club!

Bork Halvekkian, author of the bestseller, We the Anesthetists, puts it this way:

“People struggle to get an appointment for surgery, and hear on the Internet about instances of malpractice.”

“They see a neurologist making a six-figure salary, and think, ‘I could do that!’”

Halvekkian says the next step is obvious.

“Unsurprisingly, there is a groundswell now of people performing major surgery on one another.”

“It’s exciting!”

And he says that the Doctors who say it’s dangerous are just protecting their cosy patch.

One of the biggest online interweb crowdsourcing meccadomes for citizen surgery is citizensurgery.com, which includes instructional videos, and a whole bunch of people scheduling surgery in a bottom-up, peer-to-peer way that Internet guru Jim O’Reilly has christened “Surgery 2.0″.

I logged on for the first time yesterday, and already a Bay Area refrigeration mechanic has offered to burn off some unsightly warts I picked up using his easy access to liquid nitrogen. In exchange, I’ll whipping out his adenoids in just two weeks, courtesy of five-minute instructional video on citizensurgery.com

But here’s one for the GuruGroupMind: have you performed or received any of these exciting, innovative, bottom-up surgical prcedures?

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Less talk, more crowdsauce needed.  What would you prefer more of (2.0)? [Image Source]

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Good morning (or good evening) everybody! I want to congratulate you for seeking solutions to what can be one of the most complex areas of success-farming in today’s media environment – people. People have changed, their needs have changed, and as the next wave of people power sweeps by, we have to change as well! Social media, in case you don’t know, is how the modern digi-elites (c) communicate and work with each other. To be socially accessible means that you are creative; and being socially accessible means being technologically connected.

That’s where I come in. Hi!

My name is Tanner Wakefield; I’m a self-perpetuating media node – public speaker, social media consultant, marketing innovator, concept navigator, digital revolution invigilator, trend anticipator, creativity agitator, crowd accomodator, convergence culture adjudicator, old-way-of-working annihilator, self-confessed digi-elite (c), and most of all - your new collaborator.

The most important element of today’s media world is the business of staying connected. If you don’t have an audience, you simply don’t have thoughtpresence (c). Without any of that thing that I just said, your business may as well go back to making horseshoes; thats how fast the digital revolution is coming, if not faster. You can’t rely on people merely buying your product – they have to be talking about it digitally all the time to their friends and other categories of positive-flow activity node contacts that may apply. You want your audience talking to other audiences. This is called crowdsaucing (c).

How Crowdsaucing (c) Works

Just four short years ago, Nintendo (who produce social entertainment media) released a gadget called the Game Boy Advance, but they had no idea how to create a true crowdsauce (c) around the product. Why would people talk about it? Why would they blog about it? Of course, the Game Boy Advance was doomed, with only 44 million sold, something had to be done. Something brilliant. Something social.

“We feel we have created a product in the Tribal edition that reflects the sentiments of today’s youth–rebellion, attractiveness, and spirituality,” said Tim Freystedt, European marketing manager for Game Boy Advance at Nintendo. “The new console allows gamers to express these emotions in a fun and interactive way, enabling them to communicate their individuality.”

“The tattoo pattern on the console looks pretty cool,” added Mister Cartoon, tattoo artist for celebrities such as 50 Cent, Eminem, Justin Timberlake, and Beyonce. “Tattoos are huge at the moment–everyone wants one. I think the console is great and will be a huge success with the more individual gamer.”

(Actual statement)

That’s crowdsaucing! (c). Even though Tim Freystedt was tragically killed in a freak aurora borealis attack just seconds after making this statement, we can see how he was able to actualise the potentiality of the regular old Game Boy Advance social media device into something really Web 2.0. Don’t know what that means? It means really social and in tune with the audience that was most able to crowdsauce (c) – the Rebellious, Attactive, Spiritual Tribe of Audience Socialisers (c) (or RASTAS for short.)

Not every product needs RASTAS. Sometimes, it may be another group, such as Pathway-Exploring Activity-Designing Opinion-Servers (c). But really, crowdsaucing happens on its own – the business of the future looks for crowdsaucing opportunities before the product, event, media content or social media discussion has even been through the first approval pre-meetings. Forget getting rid of marketing.. get rid of the product! All businesses need is an audience.

So what’s the bigger picture?

The Social Media Mapsource (c)

Its great that we have some examples, but what is a business, client, person or device really looking to achieve in today’s (or tomorrow’s) media environment? The answer is simple: thoughtpresence (c). Lets look at my famous diagram:

Thats enough from the expert.. now you’re the expert! How can you find your own crowdsauce for your business, device, person or event?

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Here at Gurnomics, we’ve been noticing a little doom and gloom on teh interwebs about the financial situation.

People are blogging (and tweeting ) about a lack of startup funding, and an unwillingness on the part of corporates to shell out for essentially useless consultants.

But here at Gurunomics, our motto is that when the going gets, tough, the social get going!

Here’s our guide to surviving the recession as a social media expert.

Tip 1 – Remember: every cloud has a social lining!

Analysts here at Gurunomics tell us definitively that latest thinking suggests that nothing lasts forever.

While you’re waiting for things to upswing, remember that social media consultancy is all about making lemons from lemonade.

Sure you have no job, but that gives you time to enhance your networks and profile on social media services like Digg, Facebook and MyTai. Just think - if you’re not tied down giving peppy Powerpoints to overresourced corporates, you can be sending out a Tweet to your network for every minute of every day!

Okay, so liquidators have siezed your equipment, but that just means the decks are clear for an upgrade the next time your ship – the HMS Social Media – comes in.

And who says the stock certificates for your social media consultancy startup are now utterly worthless? Burn them in a sawn-off oildrum to stave off the bitter winter cold, and to keep at bay your nagging sense of your own fraudulence and redundancy.

Tip 2 – Don’t forget the fundamentals!

As long as large organisations can be persuaded that they need yet another superfluous communications channel, there will always be a need for social media experts. The ones who prosper in tough times will be the ones who stick to the fundamentals!

First, make sure your commentary and predications are either obvious or unfalsifiable! Catch-cries like “social media are about connecting with other people”, “social media have changed everything”, and “companies who don’t engage with social media will suffer” cannot be disputed, because they have no empirical content!

Second, remember – if you say you are a social media expert, then you are a social media expert! “Credentials”, “qualifications” and “experience” are all soooo Web 1.0. Be confident in yourself! Feel safe in the knowledge that being, say, a Twitter expert just means remembering a password, typing intermittently, reproducing buzzwords, and developing a taste for low-level harassment.

That’s it for now, GuruFans! And remember what we say here – the wonderful new world of social media community-building is all about you.

UPDATE – I forgot to end with a question! So tell us in comments – how are you coping with this mind-bending economic shitstorm, whose chill winds have blown your SN microconsultancy away like so much pointless chaff?

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Here at Gurunomics we believe that the greatest social media insights are YOU, and today we have taken an exciting step to make that dream a reality.

Do you have some tips or personal experiences about social media that you are dying to share? Have you come across a good example of Gurunomics elsewhere that you think we should know about?

Register as a Gurunomics expert author, and start sharing lists of things and other insights with the social media revolution community today!

Sign up now: it’s easy and free.

Just remember the golden rules of writing for the social media revolution:

1. use simple, easy to understand language and correct American English spelling. Try not to use jargon. Stick to concepts we all share, like “marketing”, “influence”, and “the internet”.
2. always make lists of your wisdoms. Lists of either 10 or 5 tips, strategies or insights tend to work best. If you don’t have quite enough, try adding a punchline to the end. Don’t worry if it doesn’t really mean anything. The most important thing is to end up with the right number of killer strategies or tips in your list.
3. emphasise key insights using bold – otherwise people might not know what the important words are.
4. Always end with a question that allows your crowdsourcing community to contribute their insights and wisdom – after all, that’s what the social media revolution is all about.
5. Remember: social media is a conversation

What are some of your killer strategies for social media expert authoring? Share them in the comments.

And don’t forget to sign up so you can contribute your insights with friends, family and the whole world.

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